From the Peanut gallery - 12/31/2004

Q:
What time is it there?

A:
This is the question I get asked most often. So I've looked and looked around for a suitable clock online clock.This one works pretty well.

I'm on Baghdad time.

Q:
Have you actually met an Iraqi?

A:
Met an Iraqi like, "Hi my name is Tommie Hustle and I want to be your friend."

No.

I meet them more like, "Yeah, the Broccoli, yes Broccoli, the green stuff, yes right there. Yes, that's what I want."

I don't socialize with the Iraqis or TCNs for that matter. Not that I don't think that in real life that someone I may meet is a good person but, I'm still on PCS (Practice Common Sense) mode and I'm in no mood to talk to strangers or meet new friends.

Q:
Why do you think you don't make good husband material?

A:
In college I was an insatiable womanizer (much to my Mother's dismay). What people didn't see was I had a plan. My "glorious" plan was to do everything and try everything that a heterosexual male (had to put that clause in) could ever fantasize about before I got out of college and got married (the plan was to get married right out of college). Besides graduating from school that was dead second in things for me to do. My view was I didn't want to get married and have some fantasy that I wanted to try out and now that I was married it was out of the question or my wife would not be into it. My fear was that I would have that desire and it would build up to where I do something stupid like have an affair on my wife because I have some fantasy that I never got to try out. I figured if I tried everything till it got boring I wouldn’t have that as an issue. By the time I was out of college I had met my goal and the carnal pleasures that could ruin a marriage were old hat. Once you lift the cover on a fantasy it becomes much more mundane and not very interesting.

When I got out of school I was the perfect husband material (in my mind at least). With the physical temptations out of the way I could focus on the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. It worked out well for the most part but I have one fatal flaw. I can be incredibly selfish with my time. Part of it came from the way I related to people growing up and another part is sometimes I just don't like to be bothered with the emotions and problems of other people.

For example me being in a relationship would not have stopped me from coming out here, I think it's 50/50 that I would come out here if I was married with no kids, and 30/70 that I would have come out here if I had kids. I know that a woman needs to be first in her man's life and sometimes he needs to put his own ambitions to the side to please her. I don't know if I'm at a point where I can put my own ambitions to the side for someone. I mean I tried it once and I got burned. That's not to say that I should apply that to everyone else that's not realistic or fair but I for me I know I've been more content when I focus on my own ambitions. I know I have to reconcile that with myself before I can think about being a husband to someone. Who knows? Maybe this cash haul in a war zone will tell me enough is enough.

Q:
Do you know what hajii means and why do you call Iraqis that?

A:
Because Soldiers are discouraged from using the term towel head?

Do you mean Hajji?

Yes, and I misspell it much like it is misused here I do however I see your point and I will

1. Explain what it is for those not as well learned as you and I.
   
   Hajj is the fifth pillar of Islam and to meet the fifth pillar of Islam a good Muslim must make a pilgrimage to Mecca during the month of Dhu al-Qadah. At least once in a lifetime a Muslim is expected to make a religious journey to Mecca and the Kaaba. For the Muslim the Hajj is the ultimate act of worship. Men who complete the Hajj are called Hajjis and I believe women who complete the Hajj are called Hajjas. The term is the ultimate sign of respect for a Muslim in the mortal world. Is that close enough for you?
   
   Here is a random fact about me that most people don't know. I am well versed in the basic tenets of the three major religions (Christianity, Islam, and Judaism).
   


2. As you and I know, the term to Americans is used in a derogatory way. That is the nature of conquest. I feel I recognize this war on a level higher than what we see on TV. I look at it from the reality of it and put it in perspective with other historical events of a similar nature. In the 21st century world we like to think that we have evolved past the ambitions of Khan, Caesar, Alexander and the great Empires of history but we haven't we never will, it's in our nature. The first rule of subjugation is to render the males of any society powerless, to castrate them if you will. As a result the term Hajii is used to disparage much like nigger, chink, savage, jap, wetback, Paki, and I'm sure we could think of many other colorful terms if we all sat at the table and had a brainstorming event but, you get the idea. As the subjugator you have the power to do that and it also makes them seem as a lesser. It is much easier to kill a Hajii than it is to kill a man with kids.
   
   The second phase of any good conquest is to disparage their culture, you know call them towel head, Make fun of their accents things like that. Bring them up from being subhuman fodder but make them just below you. You enforce the idea that they can never be as good as you.
   
   The third part is to introduce your preferred culture to the deserving masses. Slavery was justified as a good thing because the slave masters were "giving" the Africans Christianity so in essence they were doing a good thing (Same with the Native Americans). In the 20^th century the great conquest was Capitalism vs. Communism by following those simple rules we have convinced the pinko, godless commies that their way of life was wrong and ours is right.
   
   In the 21^st century Christianity is not the motivator of choice. What we want to give the Islamic world now is Democracy or more to the point we want them Middle East to willing adopt liberally secularized laws (from the perspective of Muslim culture and tradition) that will allow our culture access to Middle Eastern resources. American style democracy would be a nice side benefit because nations that respect human rights and the rights of individuals are generally more productive but for now it isn’t required. This war is not exactly a war against Islam or a war for the defense of Democracy or even a war against terror so much it is a war that pits the needs of Globalization against Isolationists. If you listen to the terrorists they want the Infidels to leave their countries so they can live as they are used to or believe they should. They really don't have any ambitions (as of yet) to expand. That runs counter to the needs of the global market. The global economy needs customers and we have pretty much tapped out everyone in the western (and Eastern world) world so the only two parts left to exploit are Asia and Africa. Since Asia has a much more stable infrastructure it is easier to bring into the fold. I don't see this activity as a good or bad thing to me it is the natural course of human behavior. You can put whatever spin you want to on it I just recognize the trend is not any different that what we have seen before in history. I just know at the "end" of this war Central and South Asia will be a willing partner in the global market.
   
   But, to answer your question the reason I use it is because they Marines use it and I want to give you an idea of how the Americans view themselves and others and the fact that they, weather they know it or not, are part of the subjugation process.

That's my 2 cents you can leave it on the table if you want.

Q:
You should make a book.

A:
This is the second most common thing I am told or asked about. I thank you all for the compliments and I'm glad that you all enjoy this. However, to me this isn't book material. While you all read this you are putting your own action music behind it and imagining what you think it looks like or how it is. In reality my life here is quite bland. If it weren't do you think I'd have time to write all these blog entries? I mean this is my day. I wake up, brush my teeth, walk to the office, sit around all day and all night hoping something doesn't happen and then I go to sleep.

Fortunately for me it has been very peaceful around here and I hope it continues. I mean who would want to read a book about some guy who goes to Iraq and doesn't get shot at, doesn't shoot anybody, doesn't get the girl, and sits at the computer all day?

Q:
Did you hear about the Tsunami?

A:
Yes, it was daytime over here when we heard about it. I mean what can you say that hasn't been said. As my Brother said we haven't realized the true scope of this disaster and had this happened in Biblical times it would have made the Book. I personally believe that this will be the bellwether on how the world comes together in a crisis because this will not be the last time that humans are witness to a catastrophic event. We have been lulled to thing that the Earth is a stable place, it isn't.

How we deal with this event, not as nations, as humans concerned for our mutual survival is the real test. This event could happen anywhere at anytime. For example did you know that the entire US Eastern seaboard could be wiped out in a similar fashion? Every costal city from New York to Miami would be inundated with water from a Tsunami that could reach 300 ft high and go inland for 20 miles permanently altering the landscape of the United States and we would only have 7 hours best case scenario to react?

On a political level I think it is wise for all the leaderships should call for an end to stop the potshots about what rich countries (i.e. the US) should do or the ineffectiveness of the UN and focus on the task at hand. Don't worry about what others can do. Do what you can do. I think that some nations around the world have lost their way when it comes to criticism of the US. I think that in the fervor to make the US the new bad guy the world has unfairly labeled the people of the US. The people of the US and policy of the US can often times be at odds themselves. It is a disservice to those who are willing to help and want to help to be labeled as selfish.

I was actually at the LZ today and there was a TCN just sitting there blankly. I was told he is from Sri Lanka and he was headed back there to find his family. He came to Iraq to support his family and he has not had contact with anyone in his family since it happened. The guy standing next to him said more than likely he is the only member of his village left. You couldn't help even in this place to feel for him. What do you do when you have nothing left to do it for? I guess he knows what it feels like to be the only man on Earth.

If you haven't heard by now Amazon.com has a website where you can contribute to the relief fund. Here is the link.

Q:
You couldn't have ridden on a Blackhawk those aren't used for transporting Civilians or the highest-ranking officer wouldn't be the one to drive the Vehicle or the EOD team would pack together hundreds of pounds of explosives that would destroy the base.

A:
There seems to be some contingent of readers that are convinced that I'm some sort of phony and that I'm making this grand adventure up in some pathetic effort to get attention.

Well let me explain to you how this works. Yes, you are correct in saying that Blackhawks aren't usually used for transport however I had an ISR (Immediate Space Request) that means that I was authorized to get on the first flight that had available space. It is always the pilot’s choice to decide what gets put on what flight the pilot can take everyone or no one it is up to the pilot. This particular pilot didn't mind me hopping on board with all my gear I didn't weigh much and wasn't much of a burden. They probably had another mission and I happened to be on the way is why else would I be on a helicopter with fully armed Iraqis?

If you would spend more time reading the blog you would see that I don't write everything as soon as it happens. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't it all depends on when I feel like it or the particulars of the idea. At the time of my travels Corporal Ricky Schroder was a Lance Corporal and both Marines had equal rank. He was promoted after my ride with him and I made the adjustment in my blog.
I don't write about everything that I see or do; I went to the bathroom today would you like to hear about it?

Hey guess what? I left my "I know everything about how the EOD operates" book at home I have no clue what they are packing in there (unless you really think they pack teddy bears in the pile) I have no clue where the site is located physically on the base but I do know the blasts are strong enough for the ground to shake, moving my bed as if I bunny hopped it and knocking items off of the top of my closet to the ground. Why don't you tell me how much explosives that would take?

Hey guys look, look over there. It's the baby Jesus he just killed six kittens.

Q:
Do you have a picture of yourself?

A:
It seems I have become a bit of an international celebrity. I don't have any pictures yet and more importantly I don't have a website where I can host photos that hasn't been blocked by the firewall. Once I get a new camera and I can find someplace that will let me host pictures then I'll post up pictures of the environment and myself.

Q:
Those Marines would make good wingmen.

A:
WRONG. Maybe if we were aiming for rickety crop dusters and zeppelins. All my wingmen are ace flyers (Some have long since retired their wings). While we have all had to do our patriotic duty and take one for the team by and large my wingmen aim high and generally take out high value targets. The way I see it what your wingmen shoot down is a reflection of what you are willing to shoot down.

Q:
Why are you giving telling us where you are? You said you wouldn't do that.

1. The bombing in Mosul changed the game. The flurry of emails I got after that let me know it wasn't worth the worry of my family to not tell them where I am.
   


2. Marines are allowed in some cases to tell their family where they are. We don't get instructions from the USMC we get it from out company. They instructed us to be careful about giving out details as to where we were going (at the time this is when American contractors were being held hostage).
   


3. Simply because I didn't want to hear it. If I told people I accepted a job in Fallujah, Iraq I would have never heard the end of it. So it was better for me to say I'm just going to be in Iraq. It allowed people to think, "Maybe he'll be in the good part of Iraq."
   

Q:
I know you can't say, but if you could, how did you get into this gig?

A:
Sure I can say. I've worked in this industry for about 6 years or so and I have a software engineering background then I moved to Information Assurance as a System Security Engineer. One of the challenges of working as a SSE is that we are designing systems for a military application however the vast majority of my co-workers in that area couldn't tell you the difference between a Lance Corporal and a Corporal. In my opinion I felt that we were creating security requirements on the system in a black box. We had no idea how combat works or how our system design would fare in a combat situation where people are focused on staying alive and not the password to release the safety on the BFG 3000. I felt to get more insight on the world we were creating systems for I would need to get closer to that world that uses said systems, however at the time that was a random thought and not anything I really thought would happen.

After a few well-timed Pentagon issued budget cuts, work in my section was drying up and I didn't feel as if the management I was working for had my best interests at heart. I've learned from two layoffs when you feel management doesn't have your interests at heart it's time to get proactive. I started looking for other positions within the company and outside of the company. I happened to find a postion on our internal website that there was a postion open that included 75% travel and that some of that travel would be in areas that the State Department deemed unsafe for Americans to travel to. Well I know it's unsafe to travel to the unemployment office so sign me up. I interviewed and I hit it off well with the management off the bat, there was a rapport that I never felt in my old section, from management at least, and I think I did well on the interview. The only problem was that I was one of 87 candidates to apply for 7 positions and I didn't have any military experience.

It seemed that my charm and winning personality worked in my favor once again and I was selected as one of the seven field engineers. They gave me some training, told me to pack my suitcase, and now I'm here. If you were asking what it takes to get this job then I would say prior military experience, high aptitude with vocational skills (electrician, mechanic, cable/phone/internet installation), ability to travel freely, good personality (this is key). If I weren’t already with the company I dont think I would have gotten the job.

Well this ends the Peanut gallery for this week and for this year. I wish you all a safe and happy New Year and please take some time to think of those who need. For those of you out on the road be safe, buckle up and know when to say when. Crashing where you are is much better than crashing in the car.