This is Tommie - Babies don't wait.

Well I think we stayed broken up for a few weeks before I could grovel my way back into her life (she was probably just horny). It is around the time the right before first Gulf War was going to jump off and kids my age (as well as parents) were freaking out. We didn't know if there was going to be a draft or anything. It was kind of a scary time to be a 17 or 18-year-old boy. I mean Bush was in office, Iraq REALLY had WMD, Iraq really had a standing Army, the US hadn’t been to war in over 20 years, people were trying to make this Armageddon, or a new holy war.

So anyways I go over to her house and we start talking about war and she would be scared if I went to war and she wouldn't know what she would do and all that stuff so next thing you know we are having sex as usual but, something about this time was different. I couldn't tell you what it was and maybe it was different but I knew something "happened".

Well she came to my job about 3 weeks later and said we need to talk when I get off work. I was like ok. I called my folks and asked if I could go by Daria's to pick up some homework after work and my mom said be home in 30mins. I was like cool, I had no plans of really staying over there anyway it was a work night. So I get over there and she tells me that she is late with her period and that she is pregnant. My first thought is oh shit. There is no way I can tell my parents I just got out of trouble for ME being late, her being late wasn’t going to go over well. The idea of what might happen if my Dad finds out sent me into a panic. I'm freaking out I've got this full ride to University of Miami I'm one of the smartest kids in school, we are two of the smartest kids in school. This isn't supposed to happen to us. Well, I told just hold up and we will figure something out.

Well no one told me that babies don't wait for you to figure something out. She started going through morning sickness and her Mom knew what time it was. Hell, my Mom knew what time it was too. I remember one day Daria came by the house and my Mom blurted out, “Daria you are getting big are you pregnant?”

We looked at each other like oh no we are caught. I said, “Pregnant? Mom you can't be serious.”

Daria said, “No, my goodness Mrs. Hustle I’m nowhere near pregnant.”

My Mom replies, “You've been gaining some weight and getting a little big girl I was just asking.”

My mom probably knew for weeks but she didn't want to accept it (It goes back to seeing your child as a sexual being) so my answer was sufficient. Well we couldn't hold off on this any longer we had to tell someone. I knew I wouldn't get in trouble if she told HER Mom so I convinced her to tell her Mom. The three of us sat down and had this conversation about what a responsibility babies are and that we aren't ready for a baby and we have our whole life ahead of us and that she would take care of it. So Daria went to have an abortion with her Mom.

I didn't even offer to show up. I was just so scared that I would get in trouble. I eventually went over there a day or two after and I stayed over there everyday till she got "better" and I never thought about it again. From my perspective, I didn't get in trouble my life was saved, I wasn't in trouble, I didn’t have my Dad choking me out nothing could be better. I know for her she was never the same and I know she hated me for not being as concerned, as I should have been.

The true impact didn't hit me till I was about 22 about what happened. Every August I get a bit wistful that's when the baby would have been born. I couldn't see myself with a 14 year-old child, but that’s what I’d be looking at today. The idea is insane to me but that is my reality. People always say that I'm good with kids but it's not because I'm just good with kids. I feel like it's my penance to be good with kids because I was so flippant with the life of my own.

To this day I've never actually talked to my Parents about what exactly happened it was one of those elephant in the room situations, and open secret if you will. When I think back on it maybe I should have told them. Would I have gotten in trouble? Probably but all things come and go. In the whole they should have been let in on the situation I know ultimately the decision would have been the same but, it was an unfair burden to put on Daria and her mother.