There's something big in my pants.

Let's just say that this weekend hasn't been the greatest. It rained here and rain is awful the other thing about rain is that all the critters those live outsides want to find a warm place inside just like you do. I've been in the office for the past 96 hours and I was here sleeping on one of the beds all of a sudden. I feel something moving in my pants around my thigh. Next thing I know it is like 20 beestings all at once. I jump up screaming and start banging the hell out of my leg. I don't know what it is was but it better be dead when I get finish.

I let out a slew of obscenities and all I know is that my leg hurts like a son of a bitch. My co-worker springs up and says what's wrong. I'm say something bit me I don't know what the fuck it was but it hurts like hell.

He asked me where and I tell him on my thigh so I'm unbuckling my pants to take a look at my thigh. I look and see that there is a welt on my thigh about the size of a silver dollar and rose up about the height of a Tums tablet. It's already turning blue. I say come over here and look at this. He looks and says what in the hell bit you?

Well what ever it was it's still in my pants so I take my pants off. Now here's the kicker I'm in the office with my pants off and my co-worker kneeling in front of me looking at this sting and at that very moment the Marines come in to see what is up because I made a lot of noise. Let's just say it was an awkward moment for everyone and for the record we will not discuss such activity again. I shake my pants out and nothing comes out of my pants we look around the room and we see no signs of a nest or anything like that but, everyone is looking at my leg in amazement. Well after a few minute the Marines leave but not with out the requisite “We’ll leave you boys to finsh up your work and I have some baby wipes in the office for when you guys get finish. You want you want to stay clean boys.”

Comedians, the lot of them I’m sure they got a big Hollywood contract waiting for them back in the states. Well I wasn’t suffering from shortness of breath or anything like that so I changed pants and now I’m just waiting to see what happens. If this doesn’t go down like a normal bug bite in a day or so I’ll head to the medics.