Why: Part 2

There is a second part to this that gives it more context as to why I’m doing taking this assignment.Two years ago this time I had been laid off from my second well paying software job in two years. I was 15 days away from my car being repossessed, 22 days away from the bank starting forclosure proceedings on my home and 32 days away from the love of my life telling me she found someone else. These events conspired to destroy the core of what I considered to be my existence. Needless to say two years ago I was as low as one could possibly be. There was no one to talk to. None of my friends had been through anything like this and no one could help me financially. I was several thousands of dollas in the hole and I couldn’t have gotten that kind of capital from anyone that was close to me. My credit was destroyed from two years of layoffs and bad money management skills. I had never in my life felt so alone. I wouldn’t wish what happened to me to happen to anyone.

When I hit the lowest point I made a pledge to myself to NEVER be broke again whatever it takes. I know that there are fates worse than death. Having no hope for your own future is one of them. Money is more than power, money is freedom. The reason we love and hate celebrities is because they have money. Not for the money itself but for the freedom it provides them to do what the fuck they want to do.

I also made a second pledge that pledge was if I ever had to make a choice between being broke and being alone, I choose being alone. Trust me when you are broke it won’t take much longer before you are alone. It maybe true when you have money you may have to question why people are with you. But, the way I see it, it is way better to question why people are with you as opposed to why they left you.

But, let’s not let that get in the way of why I’m putting all this out for people to see. I just want you all to view this in the proper context. In the past two years I have just barely be able to crawl out of the hole of devastating debt and bad credit. Having a string of devastating losses really retooled my personality and outlook on life. That’s why this job (on a broad level) isn’t that bad off for me. Many people don’t know why I would do this but to be where I was and to understand that sense of loss and hopelessness makes it easier to understand why I would do that.

But, I don’t know anyone who was were I was so….

Why

People have asked me why am I going. Simple, Money. When they told me how much I could make (provided I live) my skeleton wanted to jump out of my body. I couldn't believe what they were talking about. I have friends and family that say "Money isn't worth your life" and to a point I agree. But, there is another point where I don’t.

I mean why do we go to jobs that we can't stand? Why do we speed at rush hour, run red lights, deal with pure assholes that sap the life out us just by the fact that they are breathing your air, eat fast food at places clearly unhealthy for us and all that jazz? I mean let's think about it if someone got in their car today on their way to work and died in a car accident would it have been worth it? We risk our lives everyday.

Another one the kills me is what good is money if you can't spend it? Well hell, what good is food if you can't eat it? I mean the same thought applies. The bottom line is this; you will have to assume risk for reward.

It’s up to you to decide how much risk you are willing to accept for the reward you want.

Note to all

My writing skills are terrible. I will do the best I can to insure that my grammar, spelling , tense, and verbage are all up to snuff but, if you see some glaring mistakes (or even minute ones) please email me. I'll make the changes when I can. For this to be successful it has to be easy to read.

Also if you have a question please email me. I want to post all the questions I get on the site. I 'm sure if you have a question someone else has the same question.

First Post

This is my first post in a series of many. I am a contractor who is heading to Iraq. This will be my window to the world about my experiences in Iraq and how my friends, family, co-workers and I will respond to it.