Tommie Hustle: High Maintenance?

I like to think that I'm a normal guy. I'm by no means affluent, I'm comfortable, and I’m not content. I come from the standard family unit two married white collar parents a brother, we worked hard to get what we have an where we are I'd like to think I'm a normal guy I don’t think of myself as someone who is a member of the bourgeoisie.

As I was flying to Iraq this time, I had a lady sit next to me from Zimbabwe and we traded stories about our lives where we were going, so on and so forth. She told me the most interesting story of how she lived in a hut on the plains of Africa and tended to packs of Lions. If she were Black I wouldn't have believed her but, she was white so that made it TOTALLY believable. It's always interesting to meet white Africans. They have a demeanor to themselves that comes for years of them telling people they are from Africa and people’s responses being "How can you be from Africa? You are white!"

We chatted about that for a while, then we talked about they joys of international travel. I said to her yeah I love how the hand out hot towels for your face and the heated mixed nuts in a ceramic bowl that we get and of course the free drinks I said internationally first and business class is the only way to travel.

She responded that she has never flown business or first class internationally. I responded I would never fly coach internationally. As the words came off my tongue I could hear my own utter revulsion and contempt for the concept. I immediately retorted before she could speak.

"That made me sound like jerk didn't it," I stammered "I mean I do only fly business or first class but, that's because that's the only way my company lets me travel, not that have a problem with coach I mean we all get there the same time right?"

I mean I really sounded like an utter tool, I might as well have said “Congress with the plebeians? Utter rubbish I tell you, that is poppycock my dear woman!"

She caught my shock of my tone but, she decided to have some fun at my expense. She said, “Oh my God you sound too high maintenance.”

I never thought of myself as high maintenance but, look at where I have been in the last few years. I've had a Gatsby-ish transformation. I mean I went from flat broke to now where I own three vehicles, all of which that have been purchased in the last three years (A sedan, a motorcycle, and a high performance European sports car). They have a combined mileage total of about 31,500 miles.

I go out to eat and drink and $100+ dinner and bar tabs don't phase me. I never look at the price of gas I just fill up. I have maids and landscapers tend to own a home that I don't live in or see. When I am in the states I split time between my home in Scottsdale, AZ and my parent home in Atlanta, GA and when I'm in Atlanta all I do is go out and be seen in the hottest spots.

I mean it is part of my personality to never accept less than the best for me but, I never saw myself as someone who isn’t grounded in the reality of the struggle or at least I think I am.

This comes full circle for another reason I was at a Krystals join back at my folks house (White Castle for you northern folks and a place that sells Sliders for those of you who know neither. I pull up in my Porsche and there is the lady there who looks about 42 or so filling out an application. She takes a hard look at me but, I’m kinda used to that when I’m in the P-ride not a big deal. So I order my food and the cashier says they will bring it out to me and a seat. Well, I sit next to the lady and she asked me if I went to my old high school. I said yea (I’m thinking she it the parent of someone I went to school with) then she said yeah, I remember you we went to school together. I was like really? When did you graduate, she was like in 1992 with you? I was like holy shit; I thought to myself you rolled craps of the life after high school table. I mean the lady looked to be a hard 10 years older than me. We chatted for a second and then she left the spot and went across the street to wait for the bus. I was filled with sadness for a bit, I know we all make our individual choices and that I had options that were not available to her but, here we are 15 years later and I’m riding clean and she is scrounging for 1.25 to catch the bus hoping to be a fry cook at a burger joint. At that point I really saw there were two Americas. But, if I had a choice, I choose the nice America.

How I GOT HERE PT III

I know what you are asking, "Tommie, we are three posts in and you still haven't told us how you got back into Iraq."

The easy anwser is that you can't stop my hustle! I can sell bacon to a pig. The real anwser is that one of the units I trained deployed to Iraq and they felt that the support that they were getting in Iraq was not up to the quality that they had gotten back home. As a result a high level officer requested my presence. That changed the entire thought process of the deployment managment this particular officer was not the type of person that would take no for an anwser. With his personality I suspect that he hand not heard the word no applied to him in many years. He is the type of person that would go to McDonalds and ask for some fries if the cashier said we are out of fries his response would be

"Well when you get those fries to me I want them hand delivered by that jackass in the yellow, red, and white clown suit. I want the big shoes, the god damned red afro, and I want it in 6 minutes.

Ronald would be there in probably 4.5 minutes.

So I went from parriah to everyone's best friend. The problem with it was that I wasn't too entirely pressed to go to Iraq. Not from the fear factor so much. I've been in and out of Iraq and largely dealt with my mortality issues. But my experience with the civilian managment was so caustic and so poisonous that I was (am) tired. The idea of mustering that much will to go into an already stressful enviroment wasn't worth it to me. On top of that my current stateside deployment schedule has pretty much robbed me of any type of personal life. The idea of entering the Iraqi monestary once again didn't have much appeal.


So while I played with the idea of going back, I ended up not taking the assignment due to the fact that I had to get hernia surgery that I had put off for over a year and my surgery would make me not deployable in the time frame that they requested.

When I recovered from surgery, I was then sent to support another unit. Different scneario, same result. I impressed the command and they wanted me to support them when they came to Iraq. But, this time there was something different, one I was healthy, two the unit by and large that understood what it meant to fight within the assemtric model of counter insurgency. Most my training predated the latest techniques of counterinsurgencey while I trained in that model US forgien policy would not allow what was going on in Iraq to be called an insurgency. So it was an open secret of what was being requested and what was being trained but, until the beltway decided to have their mouths match what everyone's eyes were seening as far as militray policy was concered insurgency didn't exist.

This unit motivated me and I know that they are going to the next level and I wanted to be a part of that. So when I got back to the office I let my boss know under what conditions I was willing to go to Iraq. Even at that I drove a hard bargin but, they came back to me and said yes. The gave me an offer that was too good to refuse or so I thought...


NOTE TO SELF: Never take the refuse option off the table.
NOTE TO SELF's SELF: FUCK! Why didn't you tell me that before I took the option off the table!

How I got here PT II

Well in reality, this manager had me nailed to the wall or so he thought. The reality is that I am someone who documents everything. My nature demands that emprical evidence needs to be present in all things. So while he rambled, insseantly about the fact that I wasn't a team player I was sending detailed documentation with sources back to my true stateside managmement chain.

Had I not done that I probably would have been screwed. The lesson learned there is that as an employee you should always take notes of your challenges and accomplishments. It's not someone else's job to make you look good. So my managment knew that I was on point but, they knew that they lost me as an Iraqi asset on this project which was fine by me. However, my job wanted to still use me as an asset on the project. While I was pesona non grata in Iraq, there was a loophole in this "ban" I was not banned from stateside support. The Iraqi manager's thought process was that if you were kept out of Iraq then you were denied the fat bonus checks. What he didn't realize is that my interest in the project was not primarally financial but, philosophical.

Right now the US military is going throught a remarkable pardigim shift on how they think about warfare. This is an amazing challenge for the military which is until recently been trained wholesale on the thought of symetric warfare (i.e. fighting battles with roughly equally equipped emenies) well the battle that we fight today are asymetric (i.e. battles where the emenies do not have a equal capability set in this case our emenies have a reduced capability set). In the long view this is changing how the military traditionally is thought to operate (and more importantally how the US population needs to look at war). This process is going to take a while but it is exciting to be a part of.


Back to the issue of this blog. My company found a loophole to this ban clause so as a result over the past year I was sent to seveal training centers around the world. For there I was able to ply my trade and work with all different types of military orgnizations. I have spent the past year milling of military field manuals, I voratiouly consumed any and all books and news articles I could find on Iraq, Iraqi policy, US forgien policy as well as learning military techniques from the operaters. I took (I'm still taking) all of this information and appling them with the training I supplied. I am somewhat of a Johnny Appleseed if you will. I am a natural storyteller so captivating people is fairly easy to do and for the most part I make sense. The more I trained the more that military leaders wanted me to train. Word of mouth about the "trainer guy" got out in some circles and it has gotten to the point now where I am requested by name to support operations this is a huge and a humbling honor for me. So the manager that thought he would be rid of me acutally made me bigger assest to the customer.

The bottomline is this, in life your heart can't pump kool-aid. You have to have a conviction somewhere and stick to it. You should always be mindful of fear but, don't let it take you over. You are going to have haters in anything you do, that's a haters job to hate. But, like Kat Willams said if you don't have haters that means you aren't doing it.


So at this time I'd like thank all of my haters.

How I got here: PT1

Well it's been a while since I've written on this thing and before I start into the weeds of this I suspect I need to go back to where I've been.

Last time I was here in Iraq it was nothing short of a debacle. To make a long story short I was kicked out of Iraq and banned from coming back. This wasn't an Army decision mind you, this was a situation generated due to the fact that the manager I was working for had a fundamentally different world view that what I had on what it means to be successful. On top of that the manager is an egomanic and (I would argue parnaoid) of the highest order. If you didn't move lockstep with sometimes hairbrained schemes then you were out of order. The guy managed out with a philosophy of fear.

That in itself didn't bother me so much I can deal with egomanics they are a simple lot when it gets down to it. The problem was that I never took him seriously. The thing is this projcet that I was on didn't take in to account the fact that I had

1. Been in Iraq for a year previously. That meant that the financial impetus and pressurers of NEEDING the money wasn't there for me. You have a fundamentally different type of employee when they don't have debt guiding their decsion making fucntions. I would argue that a debt free employee has a larger potential of being a more vocally principled employee. The will work from an ethical view point over a financal viewpoint (which I did my first go round).

The manager's motivator was the fact that as manager the power to you fired was this mangers perogative. This fear worked for alot of people but, for me...not so much. I'd been laid off before, I learned early on I could get another job, losing a job isn't a problem for me on top of that I squirreled away a pretty good nest egg. While I couldn't retire on it, I could easily last over a few years.

2. Been in a leadership position for a large part of my deployment last time. This allowed me to generate policy and work independently with my mandate being focus on results (results = customer satisfaction) candor for the most part was the order of the day.


This manager stifled innovation, the manager had one world view and that was it. If the manager didn't come up with the idea then it wasn't a good idea. I never worked in an enviorment like that. So in hindsight I could have just shut up and color but, the manager was out and out wrong. These arguements resulted in me getting sent home becasue I wasn't a team player.

Trust me I cried all the way to the bank.

Back in the saddle

It's been over a year since I've even looked at this blog which is funny because it was so much a part of my life for the past 4 years in some aspect. I've just taken an opportunity to look back at this thing and I can tell that I have changed. I think it's good that people write things down about themselves not so much in a quest for fame or notoriety like this blog tends to do but, in a way to reflect. Things you remember today will have an effect on you years from now. It's funny how those things work.

Well in the next couple of days the plan is to bring you guys up to speed about what has been going on with me over the past year. It's been a long trip with many changes but, I think at the end of the day worth it. So for those of you who have been here before, welcome back. For, my new readers welcome, I hope you enjoy my commentary on the world as I see it from the context of being in Iraq.

More to follow...

From the Peanut Gallery - 22 Jun 2006

Hi all I just figured I drop in to fill you all in on the who's and what's.

Q. I hear you are back in Iraq.
A. Yes, I've been back here for about 65 days or so, I was trying to fly under the radar on it and not let people know. But with all things good news travels fast.

Q. Are you going to start up your blog again?
A. Not really, not becasue I don't want to but, I'm working a different mission this time and I can really talk about it. The good thing is however in 20 years it will be a best seller. There are WAY more personalties this time around then there were last time.

Q. Why would you go back didn't you have enough of that.
A. $, why do you go to a job you hate?

Q. I thought you said you didn't want to go back.
A. I didn't however the type of technology I'm working on now was too tempting to pass up. I was "this" close from resigining from my company because of the strain this would cause in my personal life but, from a technical standpoint I'm glad that I did.

Q. They must be paying you?
A. Yeah, I guess.

Q. So how is it this time?
A. Well in someways it is much better, but in others it's much worse.

Q. Can we get some more Rogue's Galleries?
A. Yep! This one is going to be mostly Rogue's Galleries.

Q. How is it this time.
A. I've seen more crazy stuff this time, I see how sick and disturbing that some of the Iraqis are here. I know what my peacenik brothers and sisters are thinking about our horrible US soliders but, when you are exposed to the horrors that some Iraqis have been doing to other Iraqis. It changes what you know.

Q. Where you at?
A. In Iraq obviously.

Q. Tommie, are you a merc or security or something?
A. Nope, guns aren't my hustle.

Q. I don't know nothin 'bout army life.....when are you off the hook for good?
A. Whenerver I want and never. This lifestyle as shitty as it is can be very addictive. After you finish getting sickened by it, you get used to it.

Q. I thought you were a civilian?? How can they make you go back??
A. "They" can't make me do anything, my experience in performing my job in a combat enviroment with miminal oversight and diffcult customers has made me somewhat of the superstar. I mean no one keeps their start on the bench for the big dance. If I don't want to come back all I have to do is a shitty job.

I could have always tended my resigniation and I do have a signifigant savings from my last two tours but, I didn't want to do that. In reality I can only complain SO much but still. The thing that gets me is that by the end of this I'll have spend the last 15 of 24 months in Iraq and there are engineers that do the same job I do and get paid more that haven't even stepped in Iraq. The way my job was explained to me is that each engineer has to rotate. These dudes come to work crying about their wives and children don't want them to go so they get a pass. Single guy? Fuck you. Not very fair if you ask me.

Q. If you're kidnapped, what are you planning to do or say? You must have thought about it.
A. It would be a combination of me pissing on myself and thinking "fuck!". Knowing what I know about this place I'd pray for death before I'd ask for a kidnapping.

Q. At least you can tell us about all the good stuff the liberal media deliberately hides.
A. Exactly my brother, ask away.

Holy Christ it's dog balls cold around here

I believe dog balls it the proper scientific term for the level of cold around here. I'm not fan of cold but this is a whole new level of cold. Plus the phrase "central heating" is unknown to the Koreans. They have these industrial space heater things to warm up big spaces (like resturants) and they don't turn them on until you show up so they will sit there in big coats and mittens until you get there and then they turn the heaters on. I can say one thing Koreans aren't wasting energy.

Yesterday at work really sucked because we were in this structure which had no heat and we couldn't get warm so here we are doing work that takes a high degree of dexterity and we are doing it with mittens becasue it is too cold to have your hands exposed for more than five minutes.

You are still at war dummy!

I see why I keep getting these "plum" assignments. My company loves sending me places that are still at war. It took about 25 hours on the road before I finally made it to my hotel in Osan. Looking like military personnel has it's advantages. The customs folks sent me to the US military customs gate and I kinda slipped through without all the fuss which was cool.

I was picked up by a co-worker of mine who works on a different project. He was a god-send the taxi drivers here are super agressive. They will yank your luggage away from you in an attempt to take you to your hotel and overcharge you for the pleasure of taking you to your location (hopefully). I've found in my short time here the language barrier here can be problematic and there is a whole bunch of nodding on both sides even though no one understands anyone else.

The thing that sucked is that my hotel is about 1½ hour away from the airport which happens to be well inside artellery range of the Norht Koreans a fact that everyone seems to want to remind me of every time they get the chance. Where Iraq is very flat, Korea is crazy hilly like San Franscico on steroids.

Iraq and Korea are different on their outlook on war. The fear in Iraq is of the unknown attack. It can come from anywhere. In Korea they know where the attack is coming from so they don't have that same "Everone can be the emeny" attitude but, their fear of compromise of intellegence is through the roof. They are very concerned about losing intel here more so than in Iraq. I suspect it is the differnce between fighting against an sporadic cell based insurgency and a nation state.

The crew here I'm working with is different than the rough-and-tumble rogue's gallery of ecletic indidividuals I worked with in Iraq. Part of it could be the difference in mission and/or the difference in branch (In Iraq I worked with the Marines in Korea it it is the Air Force) but I'm not as much in awe with the group as I was in the case of Shen Long and Ken Obi. I think because a year ago there was such a big knowledge divide between myself and those guys. Today I'm the expert on the system and even though these guys are older than I they are still depending on my expertice.

I'm about to go out now for so dinner and I'm going to get my first chance to visit the city. This will be an interesting experince to say the least.

Back Home

I've been home for about the better part of a month now and I've just been letting things sink in. I've been kicking myself for not keeping up with the blog as I should have especially since so many interesting and just plainly odd things have happened since the last time I've written in this space. I fully intent to write about them all but I have to wait for the right time.

Being home has been quite the surreal experience. People are always asking me how was it but, they aren't really asking me to describe it (becasue for what I had to do it was bland on a day to day basis) but they want me to validate their view of how the war is being run. Those that are pro-Administraion want me to talk about all the good we are doing in Iraq and those that are anti-Administration want me to talk about how fucked up the situation is there. It's funny to me becuase this war has been so sharply and bitterly debated that even the most reasonable of people tend to go on flights of extremes.

It is as if no middle ground exists.

The truth of the matter is that both sides can be right depending on the day. I mean we all get our viewpoint from the media that we view and Iraq is a very dangerous place by the looks of it and I agree but step back for a second and think about what your local news reports first off in your city. Generally it is murder, rape, robbery, car accidents, child molestations, corruption and generally the cess of human existance is paraded to you in the first 10 miuntes of any news broadcast. Do those same reports day in and day out make you feel any less safe in your city? Most of us turn a blind eye to that news. Take the time to make the correlation. If they are showing the most violent acts off the bat in your city aren't they going to do the same thing when it comes to Iraq? The most violent people and acts don't generally define your city and the people in it the same can be said of Iraq. At the same time Freedom isn't that great of a treasure when you don't have food for your children or the ability to walk the streets of your on neighborhood. Iraqis at their core want nothing different than what we want. Safe places to raise our children.

Another thing that people ask me is if I'm going back. Well the anwser is no but the why will suprise you. It isn't the war part that bothered me, I mean that is part of it sure but not the main reason. The main reason I wouldn't go back is becasue everyone smokes. I detest smoking and I have found that smokers if the mean to or not are some of the most inconsiderate individuals on the planet. When they get up the smoke, when the go to breakfast they smoke, when they leave breakfast they smoke, they have their late morning smoke, when the go to lunch they smoke, when the leave lunch they smoke, when the get in the car they smoke, when they get out of the car they smoke, they have their early afternoon smoke, they have their "I'm thinking hard" smoke, they have their "I wish I was home" smoke, then they have their post dinner smoke, and their right before bed smoke. Smoke, smoke, smoke all day and all night. I can't stand it and for that reason alone I'd never go back.

It's odd being back and talking to my family and friends again in such a sanitized manner. The thing that gets me most since I've been home is that I no longer "fit" here. I won't suggest for a second that my experinces were anything near those of the people that had to go outside the wire to kill or be killed or watch as their comrades lives slipped away from them in an instant. But still being in Iraq has changed me it is odd to say how. I don't feel any different, I don't look any different but I am different. My family reacts to me in a "different" way. It's difficult to quantify it's like they are talking to a blur or an after image. I guess the best way to explain it is like looking at a picture on the wall that has always been there but one day you notice that it is the smallest bit uneven. Not so much that it looks off but it does look different. It's more offputting than anything else.

Going back to work has been odd as well. Everything is so bland at the office, I look around and I see people that were sitting in the same chairs that they were sitting in when I left and they have been sitting in that same place for 17 years waiting for that day when they can retire. I just look at them and I'm like is that me? I know now that sitting in an office is not for me I can't live like that can call myself satisfied. As soon as I got home my boss offered me a postion in Korea that I start on Monday. I didn't hesitate to take the offer, I'm not ready to be here at home doing whatever it is we do here. My heart is really in travelling and seeing the world. Stagnation is death to me.

I don't know I'm wierd like that.

Rogue's Gallery: 0017 Lt. Col Munster

The guys I have here are pretty low on the morale side I mean we have been kicked around and pretty much treated like shit by the Marines and our management. I've been between trying to corral these guys into some sort of competent engineering team with what we have and trying to stem the tide from full on mutiny. Out of nowhere our saviour (of sorts) arrives. When I was in Fallujah I was pretty much working side by side and day by day with the highest echelon of officer I could get to. The main reason I was so pissed about moving from Fallujah to Incompentent town was because my efforts in Fallujah with senior officers was what was getting my staff what they needed as far as support. The senior officers pretty much cut through the crap to get me what I needed. Figuring that I am a GS-13 that is actually the level I should be on. At anyrate this is going away from who Lt. Col Munster is.

By the time I got to Incompentent Town I was able to work my way to his office and get and audience with him, I had met him before when he was in Fallujah and it appeared that he had big plans for all the Field Engineers in country. The first thing we got from him was that he looks just like Herman Munster. It was quite bizzare to take instructions from him because basically he looked like a character from a campy 60's TV show.

That being said he had a plan for us and he was the first person that I actually worked with who actually cared enough to get something done for us.

He pretty much defined how the Marines view us here as contractors. This is actually what he said and I quote

"Marines don't give a shit about you they don't care where you sleep, where you eat, how you get around, or where you live. We are like come here contractor and suck my cock! After you get done sucking our cocks you are like where am I going to live and they are like I don't give a shit contractor you sucked my cock now get the fuck out!"

That's pretty much the life of a contractor.

The Office

As part of my ongoing incompentent town coverage I present to you our office. This is pretty much all we have been given to work on a multi-million dollar pieces of gear.



And this was the word for word quote when I suggested to SNCO that it would be better for our gear if we were working inside.

"ESD, oh you can't get that out here."

The City

One of the questions that is always asked of me is "How far are you from the Iraqis?"
I never really tell people but, as you can see from this pic I'm not all that far. Basically if you walk down that hill you are pretty much in the residential district.

Welcome to Incompentent town.

As you all well know I haven't updated my blog in quite some time. This has been mostly to the poor communications that I have had access to. But, now that things have changed a bit I'm in a better position to update like I would like to.

At anyrate welcome to Incompentent town. If you all have been paying attention I told you all way back that Maj. Dynamo is not someone you would want to cross or he would make it hard on you. Well guess what everybody? I crossed him as a result I was moved to a place that we here call Incompentent town. It seems that when you are deemed incompentent this is where you go. It's the home for misfit field engineers I susppose. At first it was just an inside joke for us losers until the Marine made it official by pulling the cord on an ejection seat on an old Iraqi fighter jet. Launching himself out of the cockpit and breaking his neck on impact.






For me to go into full disclosre about everyone I'm going to have to come up with a few new Rogue's Galleries so my next few articles are going to back track here and for me to tell the true story I'm going to have to dig back to roughly September.

This is Bullshit: The aftermath

Well it looks like I won't be going to Haditha but, it cost me. Because of my "poor teamworking ability" (read: ability to save my own ass) I got moved out of Fallujah and to a place called Taquaddam which sucks. This place has none of the facilities that I have set up and networked to get over the past year so I'm in the process of starting over. I am actually building a new office. When I say building I mean they gave me a hammer, nails, and some wood and said "Here bitch build it yourself." They are putting in AC and phones but me and this other guy have to put it together on our own.

On top of that the unit I have to support is the unit that got me arrested last year. That's a whole bunch of fun and they have asked that I not show up in their area. But, in a stroke of bizzare my company actually grew a pair and tried to stick up for me.

This place gets more and more bizzare everyday.

Voter apprecation day

Well here I am on another historical day (I guess) in Iraq. Like it was last time it is really quiet around here. I mean too quiet. The last few weeks have been really hectic becasue everyone has been busy getting prepared for the elections.

We have been running some serious overnighters here in Fallujah insuring that the comms that we support would work flawlessly today. I'm pretty happy with the end result, it took a lot of work for us to get the Marines to see that preventative maintenance is in their benifit.

This is some bullshit Geraldo!

I am SO pissed right this minute. It has been my general rule not to let my displeasure show on the blog (hence why there haven't been may entries of late). They want me to go to back and forth from Hit and Haditha for the next 30 days. I don't have that many days left in Iraq and they want to send me to two of the most dangerous places in the world. I'm seriously thinking fuck the tax break send me home.

They shipped me to Fallujah when it was a hellhole let one of these new guys set up there like they made me set up in Fallujah a year ago. I'm seriously thinking about quitting. Too much risk. I've been here for 312 days I need 18 more to make my tax break but you know what Uncle Sam? You can have it, I don't need that funky little money if this is what I have to do for it. Fuck it I out, you win. Game Over man, Game over.

I've heard that no one likes a quitter but, you know what no one likes dead people either.

It's never that bad

We had a guy at one of the units that I support kill himself the other day. Young guy, I didn't know him, hell he was only here for two or three days. There have been a couple guys try and kill themselves around here with varying degrees of success (or failure depending on how you look at it). Suicide is something I can't fathom even as difficult as my life has been at times I know that the good far outshines the bad. What can you do? life, death it's all the same around here and the only thing people do is pick up and move and at the end of the day the statement he was trying to make will be lost and he just like the rest of us will be just another number.

God have mercy on us all.

Been doing this for a year now.

Wow, it's crazy I've been doing this blog for a year now. I actaully went back and took a look at some of my work. I never really look at it but, I figured I'd take a quick scan to see where I was this time last year. I can tell you this much I had no clue what the hell I was thinking.

Everyone changes overtime but, for me I feel like I've really changed, being here has turned me into a different person. My outlook on the war is much different that it was when I left. I mean when I left the states you could say that I lined up perfectly with the Howard Dean outlook on this war. Now that I've been here for a nearly a year I can say that I'm more aware of the daily realites of the war and while I'm not crony of the GW school of thought I am more sympthatic to the plight of the warfighters and their daily stuggles. To me it'something you have to experince, no matter how many American flags you put on your car you don't know what it is like unless you are here. I think both sides in America are blinding themselves from the truth. The reality of this place is one big shade of grey.

If someone were to ask me what lesson I learned out here I would respond "When it comes to war the less you put into it, the more you get out of it."

The replacements

Well I can tell the end is near my replacements are coming soon and they have three guys that are coming to replace me. On one hand I'm like damn it takes three guys to replace me but on the other hand I'm like my company got over because that tells me I'm worth three times as much. A sucker is me.

Rail Riders

We have a term for people out here that are action junkies. I mean everyone out here is an action junkie to some extent but some go further than others. Rail Riders come from the term "riding the rail" that is to get as close to the edge as you can without falling off.

Some guys I know take unecessary chances "ride the rail" so they can go back home and tell awesome war stories about when they took fire or when something exploded or something like that. That's not my thing, I'll tell you right here and right now. I don't have any war stories and I don't have any desire to have a war story. If I ever have one I'm not telling anyone. It's not something I'd think I'd enjoy and I don't need the high.

I stay away from rail riders becasue they are psychotic in my opinion. They take unecessary risks and put others in danger for the glory of being someone who can say they did it.

Happy Birthday!

D. Hustle Jr. you are two years old today! I remember 2 years ago to the hour I was holding you in my arms thinking you were the most amazing thing I had ever seen in my life.

I'll see you soon

Love,

Uncle Furious!

Blood and Sweat

There are days that literally hate this place and this is a story of one of these days. I was coming back to Fallujah from one of my countryside tours and when I got on the ground there was no one to pick me up from the LZ. Well, I called the people that are supposed to give me a ride and they were like we don't have a ride for you *click*.

I'm like WTF? I am all over the country supporting the troops like the President said I'm supposed to do and you can get me from the LZ to my room. It's early in the morning, I'm in the middle of nowhere, I have YOUR gear that YOU need and you can't give me a ride. So what can I do? I sling my seabag on my shoulders with about 150lbs/70Kg of gear and the other 100lbs/45Kg of gear (not including my vest and helmet) and I walk, I walk for several miles nonstop. I was between angry and determined and you have to remember out here it is still over 100°/37° even at night. So I'm dripping in sweat and numb to the pain in my feet and shoulders.

I think the thing that made me even more angry is that Marines in cars passed me by without even thinking to stop or asking me for a ride. But, it's cool, I guess I'm not Semper enough to matter. So when I get to my office I just crash down in a chair. My hand hurt, my feet hurt, my shoulders hurt and I'm just in total pain and I'm just sweating like crazy from my shoulders. I put everything down and then drink like 4 liters of water before I drag myself to bed.

When I wake up in the morning my shoulders are killing me so when I take my shirt off I see why. The straps from my seabag had cut into my shoulders and I was bleeding from my shoulders. My shoulders are all black and blue bruised and sore from that. I will never forget about how the troops support me.

But, at least I'm supporting the troops right?

To anwser your question

This question was asked from my last Peanut Gallery. I haven't gotten much in questions lately so I figured I'd better ask it now.

Why did you ask for an extention?

I did the first six months to see how it was out here. I mean part of me saw the money and there was another part of me to see what it was like to be in a war zone. To see if what we saw on TV jived with what I experienced myself. Since I saw that they were two different things in parts. I decided to extend, plus with me being out here for a year I will get rid of all my debt. I'll be flat broke but, I'll own everything with my name on it. Not a bad deal I think, heck I can quit and then work at McDonalds and ball out of control. To me I want the freedom of not owing anyone. This gig will make that possible. Everything outside of that is secondary.

Why did you not come back to the states after your six month term had ended?

I did, I was on the low. I really tried to only speak with people that emailed me regularlly while I was out here. When you get out here you find out who is real and who is fairweather, not like I didn't know before but this kinda made it obvious to me who did and didn't care. So I was kinda like whatever but, on the same note there were those who I didn't really talk to in real life but regularly emailed me every week or so just to say hi. Those emails really came in handy when it was darker out here.

Rogue's Gallery: 0016 Shoulderman

Shoulderman is a newguy that I work with.I call him shoulderman because he is always looking over my shoulder, man!

I mean whatever I'm typing or looking at this guy is always on my screen. It annoys me to no end. I'm someone who tries my hardest not to look at other people's screens unless invited. To me that's someone's personal time and I try to respect their space especially since we have so little personal space out here.

He has another habit that it one of my peeves as well, he laughs at his own jokes. That is crazy lame. I don't know if he knows he does it because he actually thinks he's that funny or if it is a nervous habit. Either way it everytime this guy has a comment he makes me cringe becasue I know he has that laugh coming behind it.

Anonymous be gone

Sorry all only registerd users can comment. Looks like the spam monster has invaded the site.

Rogue's Gallery: 0015 SSgt. Huckleberry

SSgt Huckberry is on of the utility Marines that I work with, he has been a Godsend for me. I'm the resident diesel mechanic around here and if you know me that should tell you had sad the situation is. I'll tell anyone in a New York minute that I'm the smartest guy in the world. Not becasue I know everything but, I know how to find someone else that knows what I need to know. Back in the darker moments of this job I had to go out and network with people here and there to get what I needed. If anything I'm good at that.

Well SSgt Huckleberry is from some small town in Mississippi north of Gulfport and the like. He was married but, he got divroced from his wife of 14 years about 3 years ago he choose the job over home and she couldn't deal with it. Sometimes however distance gives people time to grow they have two kids together and from what I can tell he is all about his kids. He talks to his ex-wife daily and it seems like they will probably get married again once he gets out of here. He is retiring soon and wants to start over right. The thing that I liked about him most is that he isn't like most Marines. I mean I have guys coming to me all the time asking about getting a job with the company and how to do it. I never promise them anything but, I will always give them the company website and offer to help them with their resumes if they want it. Until SSgt. Huckleberry came around no one to date has been by my office for resume help.

Well he came in the office and once he saw that I had a computer he asked if he could use it because he needed to find some information. Well, I said sure (internet access is like gold around here) and what he logged onto I thought was going to cause a paradox in the timespace contimuim destroying the universe as we know it. The guy when to www.coondogs.com. I mean this guy is using the internet to find the perfect coon dog.

I didn't think that was possible.

How you get on top.

As I have said before if you have been keeping up when I came back from R&R Falljah was in shambles and I was really down on this job. I just kept pressing forward and doing what I needed to do

Gentlemen,

I have just returned to Camp Fallujah after a four month absence and here is what I have found. Thomas Johnson has supported our two UOC customers here, RCT-8 and 1/6 in an EXEMPLARY fashion. Every Officer and Staff NCO I have met with thus far have been extremely complimentary and find his professionalism, work ethic and knowledge of the system to be outstanding.

I was nervous about Tommie being here alone for such a long time, but he has acquitted himself well. The relationships he has built, nurtured and sustained both here and at Taqqadum reflect very highly on the entire team. And on a personal note, the office in Fallujah has never looked more squared away and professional.

Tommie is a true asset to the team, and is one of my "ringers"; please pass on to him my sincerest compliments and please make an entry into his personnel file indicating my kudos and his superior performance in this extremely harsh environment.

SF
Major Dymano

I've been putting in a lot of hours fixing the unfixable and putting things right but, I have to thank Mahi Mahi for supporting me while I'm here. The two of us had to dig in deep and hard to make it work.

That being said I'm on top now so that means I have to be extra careful of how I do because there are many that want me to fail even within my own company. I fully expect to be fired when soon after I get home.

It's the price of success.

Ow my feet

Anyone who has seen my feet know that view them is like winning the lotto. In reverse, my feet in general are horrible but the contidions here are much worse I put powers and creams and all that jazz on them but they crack, itch, burn, and bleed daily. The pain is incredible (and yes I've gone to the doctor) it's gotten so bad that I've gone out today and bought 30 pairs of socks. I burned all my other socks and I'm only going to wear these socks the first time then I'll get them washed and after the second time I'm burning them. Hopefully that will help to spare my feet.

From the Peanut Gallery - 08/25/2005

Yes I'm back with a new edition of from the Peanut Gallery. It's been a while so let's start with the most obvious question.


Q:

Why no post lately, it is the only way of know what you are doing and if you are ok.

A:

Well this is an answer that has three parts

1. The purpose of my blog was never to be a place for self-introspection or blithe narcissism. The purpose of my blog has always been to have a place for my friends and family to keep up with me while I was in Iraq. When I left for here I didn’t know what kind of access I would have to communication so I figured it would be better for me to give little update that all the people I know could get to instead of answering the same question 55 times. Since I’ve been out here I’ve acquired Webcams, VOIP, VOIP chat and all other sorts of nifty communication devices. So I’m able to reach my family as often as I feel. There isn’t as much need to update my blog as it was for my original intent.

2. I never talk about my company or sensitive information on my blog. It’s one of those subtle things that if you have been paying attention you would notice. On the flip side everything that has really been going on with me that would be of interest has been things with the company and classified information. As a result while there have been plenty of interesting stories to tell none of them would make it on the blog anyways.

3. There really hasn’t been much going on. Iraq isn’t as mysterious to me as it was in my first six months. It is industry now, being in Iraq is my life it is normal to me now not abnormal so things you all would consider noteworthy are no longer noteworthy to me anymore. I’m institutionalized now.

Q:

How hot is it there?

A:

When I got this email it was much hotter I would say we were hitting about 125° F /52° C with lows in the low 100s/35-ish or upper 90s/36-ish. With it hitting the end of August it has cooled down to so the highs are about 116°/47° And the lows are coming in at about low 90s/33-ish in the early morning can be quite chilly.

Q:

What do the troops think of Cindy Sheehan and do you think the President should meet with her?

A:

With most things domestic the troops I know don’t care one way or the other. Her plight isn’t relevant to them. The fact of the matter is that bottom line her son and every other solider in the military today joined of their own free will. The military is ALL VOLUENTEER and it won’t change. Everyone I talk to is pretty much saying sure it's sad that her son died but, when we sign up we know the risks of this job. It’s the risk that each and every military personnel take as well as the civilian contractors.

Yes, Mom I’ll always be your baby boy but in reality these are men and women here not children. They all decided on their own to join the military. So when I die or someone else’s adult offspring die don’t go clamoring to the high heavens talking about Bush killed my son. No, he didn’t, your son or daughter choose to accept those risks. Your son or daughter may not like them but that’s how it goes. By failing to remove the President from office you accepted the policy. The president was re-elected on the promise that he would continue the polices of the last 4 years.

If you didn’t like the fact that people are here in Iraq then you should have voted for the other guy. You did? Well did you tell your friends and family to do the same? Did you convince them that the other choice was a better option; did you do the same for your state Senators and Representatives that agreed with this policy? Instead of looking at the President and blaming him look at yourself. Your failure to convince enough people to vote against him is the problem not him.
[/rant]

On top of that the political statement she was initially making has become muddied with every left wing nut that has a bone to pick with the President. I think her statement and the anti-war statement would have been more effective if she stood out there alone for those five weeks. She should have made one statement "I have nothing to say until I speak with the President." and from there she shouldn’t have said another word to the media or anyone else until the President spoke with her or he left without speaking to her.

I used to think before I got here that the Administration would have to start up a draft to meet the needs of the military. But, unless we start getting invaded there will never be another draft. There is no need to have one. Who needs the negative publicity for their party or the social upheaval that a draft would cause? On top of that the military personnel don’t want draftees they would much rather have an individual who was willing to sign up over one who wasn’t.

Now then should the President meet with her? 100% absolutely not, for what? The king doesn’t sully his hands with peasants and at the end of the day that’s what you are looking at a king and a peasant.


Q.

Are we winning the war?

A:

It all depends on how you define winning. What is winning? What were/are the objectives of the US military? By my account the goal of the US military was to topple the Baathist regime that was in power in Iraq due to the fact that the regime was *cough* harboring WMD. It’s not the military’s place to question the judgment of the President it is their place to execute the President’s plan. So if you use that definition then we are winning and we won a long time ago.

Is a condition of winning the war to maintain order in Iraq (i.e. act as law enforcement) then they are starting to win that war. At the same time it was a failure of political leadership that caused the breakdown in maintaining order not a problem with the US military not being able or willing. Because the political leadership reacted slowly then military did as well, the military is only as effective as those that lead them. In that I would call it a quagmire or a stalemate. Today the military controls 99% of the area that it occupies with an iron fist. It is the areas outside of the military’s control that currently has problems but, the military’s job is to win wars not, maintain order and issue parking tickets (how many howitzers does your police department have).

Is a condition of winning the war to stop the insurgents from killing Iraqis? Well if that is the case then we are losing, right now the only thing that is going on here is that Iraqis and foreign insurgents are killing Iraqis.

You can find victory or defeat in any action in this war. I would define it as a quagmire with several issues, all political that need to be resolved before VICTORY can be declared.

This is Tommie: All bad things come to an end too.

Well, after the homecoming ball we didn't officially break up but the relationship was over emotionally. I took her as low as she could go. She still had the fact that she was smarter than me so that were her edge if she could beat me in school then she was ok so she put all her energy into being the smartest. Around senior year I wasn't attracted to brains I was attracted to tits. So her attempts to best me were null. I had been invited to the kingdom of cool, I had offically made it. I wasn't playing her game.

Well back to college U of M cost 21k a year that was expensive, I mean I knew I had a full ride but, I had to keep a 3.0 average (B average).

Some how my folks said why don't you look at a historically black college. See in the states White folks when thru three phases when it came to the education of Blacks

1. They didn't want blacks to read at all
2. If they did learn how to read then they could at their own school.
3. If it's against the law, then I guess they have to learn with us.

HBCU are what we got in stage 2. It's were in the 1890 till probably the mid 1980s where blacks when almost exclusively to get their college educations. They weren't allowed to go to White schools. Well Tennessee State University had an engineering school that had a 96% employment rate out of its graduates it was 8k a year I was eligible for a full ride scholarship if I went to this summer school program (man was that a joke) but, the thing was when I went to that school they had some of the most beautiful black women I had ever seen in life. If I were to die and go to heaven it would have been TSU. I was sold if I could get into TSU I would never ask for anything again.

Well, that was the final, final straw with Daria when I told her I was going to go to a Black school she was incredulous. I was like whatever. So at our graduation our Valedictorian, Salutatorian, and Senior Speaker were to speak. Well the school had a contest for the Sr. Speaker and of course I won. I'm an excellent public speaker, she was pissed that I beat her on that. So she had a hissy fit and they made a special speaking role called Star Student for the student with the highest SAT score in our school, which just HAPPENED to be her (my SAT score would have been off the chain if I took it 3 times too). Well, everyone that spoke had a well wishing speech except her she had some diatribe basically going off on all the people that slighted her in the past 12 years with a special nod to me. I mean she didn't say any names but everyone knew the people she was referring to. I remember when she came up with that speech I begged her not to do it because she was going to make people mad, and at this stage of the game it was too late to try and get back at everyone. She said she was going to change BUT she was going to win. I was so mad at her for that I didn't speak to her again. Well not again she sent me some letter during the first week of college just to insure I got her message. I didn't talk to her again until after I graduated from college and I could tell that the bitterness was still there.

And you know what? I can't blame her.

But, at the same time she didn't know what my ultimate goal. The whole point of me doing what I did in high school was to make sure my brother didn't have to go through the same things I did. I know he hated being Tommie's little brother and he was always compared to me in school by our teachers but, the way I see it at least he was compared to someone cool instead of a punk. I think that would have been worse.

Rogue's Gallery: 0014 Desert Queen

Oh what can I say about the Desert Queen. She is a black lady who runs the laundry at one of the bases I frequent. She is funny to me. I’d say she is in her late 30s/early 40s or so she has this crazy long Barbie doll weave in her head. Not that I have a problem with weave but let’s just say it isn’t well kept aside from that having an extra two or three pounds of horse tail on your head isn’t the wisest thing to do when temperatures are 120/49+. But, her best asset her I would assume would be her newly crafted breasts. She walks around with low cut shirts on and man I tell you what she is the Queen of Iraq.

This woman can part the ocean when she steps in the place. Not that she is “cute“by my standards (Ken Obi called her 10x2. 10 in the body, 2 in the face) but, hell when you can strut your stuff around a fortress of young able-bodied men you tend to get what you want. I mean I’ve talked to her a bit and she is a nice woman for what I know her valley girl voice annoys me a bit but, it’s cool it gets her what she wants. When she comes into the chow hall EVERY man in the place turns her way to get a look that has to be a high. I’ve watched it happen several times; the other funny thing is when she walks by conversations automatically start to be about her. It’s crazy, yo.

I have been asked if I would do her and I tell everyone, I wouldn’t and they always look at me funny and I always say it’s the Devil Dog in you son you’d eat from Satan’s doggy bowl. I think anyone who is out here is a bit nuts (present company included) and I think the women here come for the extra attention they can get. In the normal world most of them wouldn’t get a second glance but, here you can go from a stateside 4 to an Iraqi 9.

Out here, well it changes you.

I suggest you read that link before you read the rest of my blog entry it makes more sense that way. But, if you don’t read it I’ll give you the summary. It talks about the difficulty that veterans are having as they return from the war. I can really empathize with them. I can understand one level at least what it is like for them. I in no way have experienced exactly what they have experienced but, this environment changes your mentality and your overall outlook on life. The people here rely on their training and that training rubs off on you in a way and as a result you become more martial in your outlook there is less pondering and more moving to action here.


There have been times where a base has taken incoming and I've been outside near that impact. It's either physics or you prayer that kept everyone safe that day but, we just kept camly walking and someone casually stated "I think that was a rocket? I guess whe need to get our flaks and go to our meeting points I'll see you in a bit."

We parted ways and grabbed our gear and that was that. I mean if the same thing happend outside in a mall parking lot there would be mass chaos in the mall. Here with the same level of protection a mall would give us no one would think twice.

I mean it’s bizarre how things are to me now, when I first got here I was freaked out by the number of guns that I’m surrounded by coming from the suburbs when you see handguns and large caliber rifles that is an indication that the communication process failed spectacularly and that you need to be heading the other direction ASAP. Now it’s just another day often times I’ve taken apart and put a weapon back together just to see how to do it.

I often wonder what kind of person am I going to be when I get back, I think I am still the same but at the same time while I've put the world on pause the world has moved on without me. Am I the same Tommie my friends and family still remember? Am I something greater or am I something less? I don't know that anwser. I still question the morality of this as well, I mean even though I'm not the trigger puller my skills have been used to assist in the death of dozens if not hundreds of human beings. I can argue that it's part of the job or that we have to accomplish the mission or that's what we are paid to do but, how will I justify this when it's my turn at the pearly gates. Is it good enough to say to God that I was doing my job? Does God make exceptions for war? How many degrees of seperation is there between the person who fired the bullet and the people that supported the fireing of that bullet? Where does forgiveness begin? What piece of my sould do I have to leave behind in order to make it? These are questions that I don't really have the anwser to and while I don't think of them much I do think of them. I know when I was at home adjustment to the real world was awkward. While I'm quite sure I won't go Deer Hunter that doesn't mean I won't have trouble adjusting I just think I'll do it faster than Matthew Sepi or Daniel Cotnoir.

Tommie Hu$tle: asshole

I have these dudes next door to me they are all cops, you know good old boy cops that came out here to ‘help the Iraqi police force’ but if they can pop a towel head or two that would suit them just fine as well. At any rate when Mahi Mahi was here we used to listen to music. I listen to rap music and not that mainstream 106 and Park bullshit. But, the real deal I listen to 666 Mafia, UGK, Too $hort, Webbie, Mike Jones, Eightball & MJG, Juve, Cash Money, if it isn’t South and it doesn’t have that thump then it doesn’t get play by me. It is what it is. Well them being cops they hate rap music so when we were listening to music not very loud mind you but loud enough to remind the cops that a Black guy was near by one of them came over and say you music is bothering everyone in the building and you need to turn it off.

Oh really, well it’s not bothering the two of us in here but, you know what I’ll be a good neighbor and turn it down a bit so you can continue working. But, I’m sure as soon as you get some Lynard Skinnard, Jimmy Buffet, AC/DC, Creed, or whatever bullshit you listen to you’ll be pumping it out to high heavens.

Well a couple of weeks later we were listening to music and mind you I had already adjusted it to a “comfortable to White folks” level but, of course they weren’t happy with that so what do that do bang on the wall as hard as they can. Turn that shit off asshole!

Ok cool we’ll turn it down again, whatever man.

So of course yesterday it happened the motherfuckers were over there playing Sweet Home Alabama loud as hell, and I mean loud and they were over there hootin’ and hollarin’ like they had just got first place for their prize pig Mrs. Biggels at the county fair. Now then I could have been Christian about it and turned the other cheek but you know what fuck that, Jesus didn’t have to listen to that bullshit. So I go over to their office and say hey guys could you turn that noise down I’m conducting business next door. The looked at me like I killed all their little fun. But you know what I don’t give a DAMN! If I can’t play my music you can’t play yours.

That’s right I’m a hater.

This is just an aside

This is one thing I’ve never understood about white people and maybe someone can help me out, but I don’t know if they even know. They are good for offering their advice when it’s not asked for.

I’ll be somewhere listening to my music or some rap music will come on and without fail someone is going to say to me “You know, I really don’t like rap music.”

Ok…I really don’t like tomatoes but, you don’t see my going up the produce guy at the store to let him know.

I suspect that what they are trying to emote is that they don’t understand why such music is popular simply because the content runs counter to the social mores that they hold to be self-evident, white people by and large are law abiding citizens who trust wholeheartedly in the goodness of their fellow man. They tend believe in the rule of law and the words that are spoken from duly elected leaders. White people by and large are optimists.

Blacks on the other hand have gotten a raw deal when it comes to the law, they tend to believe that the law really runs on a sliding scale (which happens to run light to dark) and their attitudes reflect that in Black popular culture.

On top of that White people are more in tune with words than with beats. They tend to focus on the words rather than the beats. Do you think it is the lyrical content from Uncle Luke, Master P, Lil’ Jon, Mike Jones, and the Ying Yang Twins that made them millionaires?

But, that’s all logical if you can’t understand why Snoop Dogg had to go to the party blaze some endo, smack up his bitches, then whoride on a punk bitch that was sect trippin’ then there’s really nothing I can do to help you start liking it.

Loss

This has been a hard week for me both Ken Obi and Mahi Mahi are on their way home leaving me as the only guy still in Fallujah. This place is crazy it's like an emotional intensifier. Whatever emotion you feel for someone or something gets intensified becasue you don't have any reasonable way to get away from that thought (or sometimes that person).

Mahi Mahi and I were talking about this, Iraq isn't for the weak. You have to be of strong mental character to handle this place, and not so much handling it here but when you get back and how you deal with people who don't experience this. It's hard to explain but, I know that I am different know than I used to be.

When Shen left I wasn't saddened it was a marking point but, I wasn't saddened but, it was a few nights ago and Mahi Mahi and I were just sitting around working and he says to me 'I'm gonna miss you man.' and I was like "I'm going to miss you too man."

There is something that is special about hetrosexual man-love. It seems more real but, if you have lived in the conditions that we were subject to it becomes natural. You need someone here to bond with it keeps you sane. But, unlike others that I have worked with we actaully became close and he is someone that I would consider a friend. I don't know how the real world will change that when I get back and we meet up again but, while he was here it was real enough. Under shelling you tend to learn a lot about a man and his goals.

Then a night or two after that Ken and I had to say our goodbyes. This is a man that has been through the real shit with me when this wasn't the lovely paradise you all read about in the papers. He was with me when the Marines tried to stick with me treason and he is the guy that taught me how to eek a living out of this god-awful meager existence. It's like saying goodbye to your parents and it was emotional, not terms of endearment emottional but, it was. People leaving is a bittersweet experience, you are happy that they are leaving and part of you wishes it was you (the person leaving coincendenatlly never feels that way) but, when you leave you you are concerned for the people you leave behind. I'll tell people there are only two types of people in Iraq casulities and survivors of casulities.

Congratulations Survivors.

Living Hell.

We have been without power here on and off for the last two days. Can you imagine being in roughly 130°/54° temp with no AC. I have never felt so awful, on top of that it's humid so it mind numbling hot and you are sweating what moisture you can afford like a pig. On top of the blistering sandstorms that have literally destroyed my sinuses, there is nothing you can do to get away from it.

This is just crazy.

How can it be hot, dry, and humid all at the same time.

Plesant Suprise.

Well yesterday I was in the office doing really pretty much nothing. But you know how sometimes you get in the flow of doing nothing and that's all you want to do. Well that's where I was. Then the TACPhone rang (tactical phone), that means only one thing. Something is broken, the TACPhone is only for military traffic only (in theory) I wasn't really in the mood to move or do anything so after I spat a few profanites at the phone I picked it up to see what was wrong and immediately I knew the voice. It was my old college roomate Spellmore, talk about a plesant surprise. That really made my day, I have been getting progressively disillusioned about my role here so it was nice to I knew he was in country but, I didn't know where or what he was doing. But we talked for a while and caught up one some old times and basically let each other know what we could do for one another (this place lives on the barter system). I plan on taking a trip around his way in the future to see how he is doing.

It's funny we found the worst place in the world to have a reunion.

Why Halliburton is the most corrupt corporation in the world.

If you know me you know my utter contempt for that coporation, what it represents, and who it represents. Outside of no bid contracts becasue of course Halliburtion is the only company that has the expertice in cleaing toilets, or cooking food in Iraq or bilking taxpayers out of billions in fradulent fuel charges(for the record gas costs about .85 a gallon in Kuwait retail and they were charging somewhere in the area of 5 dollars a gallon). The kicker, when I thought they could go no lower I found out that Haiilburtion/KBR employees have to PAY half the plane ticket to go home.

How screwed up is that. I mean what business on the planet makes you pay your way home? What makes it worse it that of course Hailliburtion charges the goverment for the full ticket fare but do they reimburse the employee? No, they don't and I've found that some of the people here come out here for around 55k/yr so the cost of a plane ticket is enourmous on that salary.

KBR you suck. Must be nice to have friend in high places.

Everytime Bad news comes from Iraq

I get a call, or an email, of a smoke signal or something. People always ask me if I know the people or if I was there or something like that. If I do or don't I never say. I mean when I get the calls I'm not sure if family members have been notified and even then what is there to talk about?

Whenever Marines or Soliders die there is a noticeable pall around the base. It's like every Marine has a bit of personal reflection as if to say "that could have been me". However I've rarely seen that pall last more than a day. It must be the training because they are back at it the next day. Marines tend to say things like "I have a job to do" that's how they look at the situation. This is their job and this is what they do. Nothing more nothing less.

It's part of that coping mechnism, like I said that pall doesn't last long the Marines have a job to do.

What I tend to find bizzare is that people back in the states (and usually those that have nothing to lose) are all gung-ho about sending troops into harms way and then seem all shocked and abhored when they die. This make no sense to me, I think Americans no longer grasp the concept of sacrifice.

Too hot to wear shorts

God it's hot here. I mean other level type hot. I tried wearing shorts yesterday and the heat was burning my legs. The tempature hovers around 125(51) or so during the middle of the day and even at night it only cools down to about 110. Only in the early morning hours does it creep below 100. Between these cold winters and hot summers I don't see how anyone would want to live here. Give me one or the other but, both that's just horsepucky!

Making the best out of a bad situation

Since I've been back I've been crazy busy. So much so that it doesn't leave me much time for anything let alone posting. Besides I don't have much to post about. Not that there aren't things going on because they most assuredly are but, it is against my policy to speak ill of people and situations here (on the blog at least) unless it is in the most extreme of situations.

I mean it's not all bad although I'm dreading the day Mahi-Mahi leaves. He's been around ever since stuff around here imploded and we just spend our time laughing about the situations because they are so crazy. We have so many inside jokes that it doesn't even make sense. We have whole conversations in code. He is leaving soon and he's already gone in to brain dump/I don't give a damn mode. Which we all do the closer we get to the exit date.

Me and Mahi Mahi

Outside at his attempts to kill me in various ways he and I are both trapped on this sinking ship. The good thing is that we understand that the ship is sinking...quickly.

I think what a major problem here in this job is that people respect age more that they do skills. I guess it's a problem everywhere and the unfortunatley engineers tend to respect technical acumen more than they do personal acumen. Just becasue someone is younger than you doesn't mean they know less.

The young guys here have all noticed that from a mangement perspective that we are looked at as nothing more than pack animals and not thinking individuals. This quite frankly goes all the way back to the top. This is a difficult situation for me to be in becasue I work more with my mind and my skillset is directly related to working with people to get them to do what I need them to do. Some of the Marines here have noticed this and have started working around the power structure it is a good arrangement. The two of us get them what they need, they get happy, and we all live in bliss (for some ingnorant bliss).

Mahi Mahi and I have found this to be the case and when we operate on our own we are highly successful at getting the job done.

I'm telling you when I write my book you all are going to love the details.

And this is why I don't mess around with women in Iraq.

People always ask me if I'm having sex here and I always say no. People that know me find that very difficult to believe but to be honest they knew a different Tommie. I love women but, I love money more and if I had to choose between the two there is a 85% chance I'd take the money.

Let me tell you about a guy I know who used to work here. The guy was sharp as a tack good guy, nice to be around and he looked like a redneck Ashton Kutcher so he wasn't a bad looking guy by any stretch of the imagniation. He was a few years younger than I and was a poon hound. I mean you are here, you don't have shit to do, you can do as you please. Why not take a few of the young Marines and get that sex thing going.

Well this is what happened he was messing with this girl and then they broke it off well she was messing with another Marine. That is a major no-no on top of that they both were married. Well, mystery mama got knocked up. This poses two problems for her since she isn't supposed to be having sex and she shouldn't be having sex with a fellow Marine.

So they come together and devise a plan that will keep them both in the military. She goes to NCIS (my favorite investigative service BTW) and claims she was raped. She didn't say it was him exactly but, her physical description of the character sounded an awful lot like him.

So they wrap the boy up, question him and threaten him with a rape charge. Well, he didn't do it (no one did) but, he had to admit to having sex with her which put him in an odd position. Needless to say that the DNA tests of the fetus proved that it wasn't him and not the ex-Marines and now probably looking for new careers (if they are lucky) and new spouses (if the spouses are lucky) but, that just goes to show you that you keep a lock on it.

Well even though he wasn't guilty of anything the air around him got bad and his comapany pulled him out for the good of the project. Becasue of piece of nookie it cost him tens of thousands of dollars. Let it be said here and now. You'll never be worth my dough

You know the exact moment when you know you made a mistake?

That's where I am now. Because of the nature of the things that are going on here I can't talk about it unfortunately which sucks. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place with nowhere to go.

I hit the ground running and haven't stopped yet but, it isn't work that I'm doing per se it covering the asses of all the people that work with me. It has been a pure shitstorm of issues that have come up all at once and it takes some real political manuvering to make things work. Especially when I'm not getting the support I need from anyone hell I don't even know where to go to get the support. The problem is that getting support would cause trouble and not getting support will cause trouble.

The way blogs work today anyone can find me on the net that being said I don't want to say much but, I'm not happy here any more and it's going to get way worse before it gets better. I just hope I have a job when this is all over.

Communication isn't it great

This is another quick post to tell you all about Net2phone. It is a Voice Over Internet Protocol (VOIP) service that allows you to talk to someone via your PC for free. It's pretty nifty I can (and have) called all over the world to speak to people and besides a 2 second delay (not bad figuring that I'm in Iraq) everything sounds great.

Try it out

http://web.net2phone.com/consumer/commcenter/download.asp

you can give me a call when you get it set up just email me and I'll shoot you my login name.

I also have my Vonage softphone that allows me to have a 602 phone number. That makes calls to me in the Phx area local calls. That's cool as hell, it's crazy that I can call all over the world for pennies.

I'm still alive.

Man have I hit the ground running. I'm still working on stories but, I also working on working. Things have gone to pot since I left and it's up to me to fix it all.

Topic 853

It seems that many people don't realize I'm back in Iraq of course I never made it clear that I was going back in the blog and there were reasons for that but that is neither here nor there I'm here now and that is the way of the world but, I will give you one big reason I'm back here topic 853. Here is the kicker about this job if you don't stay a full 330 days then they tax you 40% of your income on the income earned while doing this shit job. Now then if you do the 330 days then you get a massive tax break. That is the trick that no one tells you about until AFTER you sign the papers. Well most people at least, I knew in advance that they were going to do that. But, many others don't know that and they spend the money like they earned it and when the get back to the states the find out they have an insane tax burden to pay so they end up right back here working for Uncle Sam to pay off Uncle Sam. Sounds incestious doesn't it?

For me my taxes are fine I made sure of that so now I'm on the investment plan. I have no plans of messing with anything Iraqi after my 150 days days are done. I'm on the plan now that will give me the option to no have to work again past 45. Being shrewd about how I spend and were I spend is what I'm on now. I have tunnel vision on that is kinda sad that I don't really care to smell the roses or look at the forest and all that lot but, I know that the work I'm doing here will set me up for life.

Tommie Hustle, world traveler.

On my way back to Kuwait I stopped of in Paris. I was really excited about that I mean who wouldn't be it's Paris. The city of mother fucking love man. I mean Love, romance and all that heavy shit man!

Well as alwasys reality has a different take on what that means.

First of the people in France STINK and I mean STINK. However, I don't think that is becasue of poor personal hygene I think it is becasue of their lack of desire to use ventlation and a thing commonly known as "air condtitioning". Holy Christ on a stick I was almost about to pass out from the heat and the funk. It's like they elected George Clinton as President and he declared that this would be the renamed to the City of Funk or Ville de Trouille as the locals like to call it.

But that wasn't the worst part, my flight was next to a flight heading to Lagos (for my geographically challenged friends that is in Nigeria which is in Africa). OH MY GOD I had to deal with the one two punch of French AND African funk. God that was bad. This Nigerian woman was sitting next to me and she was quite "tart". The worst part was when she stood up to fan herself with her dress I'm not going to be crass about what the smell exactly was but I will say this when she fanned herself a litter of kittens fell out from the bottom of the dress. I took a direct blast but others near me felt the effects as well. If you ever had one of those times where you just wanted to blackout and wake up where you wanted to be this was one of those times. I damn sure was looking for my ruby slippers.

I was never so happy to get on a flight in my entire life.

To all my Atlanta people that I stood up

Sorry.





Well there is more to it than that, I caught a nasty upper respritory infection on Wed and I was sick (as well as contagious) as a dog. Didn't want to subject you all my ills. I felt much better sharing it with passengers in a climate controlled plane. So France that epidmic of URI you are dealing with. It was me.

Tommie Hustle, International ladies man.

I love the ladies, this much is common knowledge. If anything I can be (and have been) guilty of choosing style over substance. T-Money used to get on me about that all the time. While his is an old school player his is also the one in my crew most likely to sum up a woman by her inner beauty. It's a funny statement if you know him but, it's true. He has that type of wisdom that he let's loose every one in a while that kept me from REALLY flying off the deep in with some of my more insane ideas.

Back to the subject at hand. In my life my penchant for "trophies" (not the best word but that's all I can come up with) has served me well I would say since college I can claim that 98% of the women I've been with have been 9's or better. It's just how I do it (Now the then 2% I have to admit I kniad fucked up sorry about all that). Part of me likes the challenge, another part likes the trophy, and the logical part of me says "Well if you get her pregnant at least people will know what you were thinking."

It's flawed logic I know but at the same time think about all those guys you see at Wal Mart holding hands with a bipedal wilderbeast. But, since I've been in Paris and Kuwait City I have learend something about myself. I haven't really seen the next level and I have to be honest with myself.

I'm in love with international women. There is just something about them that just does it for me. When I was in Paris I saw some of the most beautiful black women I have ever seen in my life I'm talking 13s and 14s. I was chatting with a few of them while I was waiting around at the lounge. That accent, with the eyelashes, the apparent attention to personal hygene. I was awestruck. I mean these women moved like the law of gravity didn't all the way apply to them. It was nice chatting with the ladies I picked up some nice French phrases and all that. When I got on the plane I was like man, my ancestor's white slave masters put us on the wrong god damn ship.

In Kuwait City DIZZAM! (more on the Kuwaiti dating secene later) There are some super dupers up in this place. I wish I could take pictures to tell you what I'm talking about then you would know. I see why the men in the Middle East are all fundamentalist when you see an body like that you know there is a God somewhere and he is very good.